As my first week of high school is (oh so thankfully winding down) I am so excited for today’s guest post. My good friend Mandy is here today with a very honest letter and it’s all definitely been very true!
Unlike the majority of our ‘internet/real life” friends who have written you letters, my time in high school has been far from perfect. I thought about telling you what you would want to hear, however I’m not sure that would prepare you for the hard times that lie ahead. Starting high school alllll the way back in 2011, I felt pressured to make the next four years the best years of my life. When reality set in, I wasn’t busy every weekend or getting along with my classmates. I felt like I was letting myself down. The truth is, the whole high school thing is way too glorified. Yes, you’ll love parts of it (like getting all dressed up for dances!) but you’re also going to hate parts, and that’s ok. This letter is a way for me to pass down to you the biggest lesson I have learned while in high school. I look forward to watching you blossom into the most beautiful tulip there is (I know you’d rather be a Kate Spade bag but whatevs). Without further ado…
So Freshman year may be a bit scary, eh? Ok, maybe more than a bit scary. Once you walk through the doors on the first day of school, your mind will probably be filled with a million different emotions. Maybe you are thinking you’re on top of the world and no matter what anyone says, you own this place! If thats you, go girl! More power to ya!
Now, if you are anything like I was as a Freshman, you are probably going to second guess every word you say, every move you make, every class you have decided to take. You are probably wondering if someone is judging you, and they will be. They will judge you if you take the bus to school, they will judge you if you don’t. They will judge you if you do your hair and makeup for school, they will judge you if you don’t. Your peers are going to judge your every move because thats what society has taught us to do: judge.
Heres the secret to move passed the judging: If you quit thinking about what your peers think and focus on what you think, you will run the school! We can either let other’s opinions of us define our personalities and our self-worth, or we can forget about what everyone else thinks and just be ourselves. If you think about it, when the day ends that bully won’t be there to inform you that she thinks you look like a poodle with curly hair. When the day ends, the way your hair looked didn’t really matter. What matters is that you’re living your life in a way that you feel confident about your every decision, and you used that confidence to positively impact someone else’s day.
So heres the truth about high school: you are going to be judge. You may at times feel alone. Ok no, you are going to feel alone, it is bound to happen. I’ll let you in on a little secret: you will never EVER be alone. Sometimes you are going to be scared, sometimes you’ll cry yourself to sleep. Its going to happen at some point over the next four years. You aren’t always going to get the top grade in the class, elected as homecoming queen, that cute boy may not ask you out. Whats the good thing about this truth? It applies to everyone meaning that you and everyone else in your school will live through times of failure, embarrassment, happiness, and success. How cool is that? You’re not the only one going through hard times and good times! Heck, half (ok maybe all) of what I listed has happened to me. It is apart of what makes our high school experiences so high school. The sooner you realize that you are not really that different from the rest of your peers, the better.
The only way to really set yourself apart from the crowd is to come out of a negative situation positively. If someone tries to bring you down, don’t fight back. Bullies bully to increase their self-confidence because they are soooooooo immature. The sooner you realize that the girl who appears confident and the girl who appears insecure are not all that different on the inside, the better off you will be. Absolutely everyone you meet in high school is battling their own war. Try not to take things so personally! Maybe the girl who pushed you in the hallway has a brother in rehab. Maybe the boy who laughed at your shoes has a dad in jail. The truth is, you don’t know what personal battle your peers could be fighting. If you’re oh-so-quick to judge them as the “bully”, then you’re just as bad as they are! Instead, take the time to actually get to know your peers. Don’t just say “hey, how are you?” to the girl sitting next to you to be polite. Instead say “hey, how are you really doing today?” and take a minute out of your day to listen, actually listen. Maybe the girl sitting next to you has an obsession with vintage clothing, maybe she loves blogging. You never really know until you ask.
On the first day of the next for years of your life, don’t hide in your shell hoping no one will notice you don’t have the most expense shoes or the latest iPhone. Put yourself out there without fearing you will be judged- because you will be judged anyways! Avoiding get so wrapped up in worrying what everyone else thinks of you that you forget who you really are. Say “Hi” to everyone who looks at you or passes you by. “Hi” is nothing more than a two letter word and a short movement of your mouth. The impact of saying that short word, however, could be monumental in someone’s life.
Moral of this letter: Much about high school is meeting new and different people. Embrace them. Value them. Respect them.
Your attitude is everything when it comes to surviving high school. Stay positive, keep your head held high, and keep things covered up.
Mandy from TQC